QUIZ: How Big Of A Douche Are You? – The Office Edition

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So I’m a little nervous to be co-authoring a quiz that determines one’s douchey-ness…When I was in high school, I once called someone a douche in front of my mother. I remember exactly where we were. She was driving. I was in the passenger seat. We were on the off-ramp about to merge onto a major highway, when the words escaped from my mouth: “He’s such a douchebag!” My face immediately turned red as we sat in momentary silence. “What did you just say?” I knew she was disappointed, but primarily appalled as her tone was firm but intentionally calm. All I could do was answer respectfully, “…He’s a douchebag….” Her face was flat and serious, “Never say that again.”

Well…I’m really sorry Mom. Here goes nothin’…

douche

For the purposes of this quiz, you should know the Urban Dictionary definition we are relying on for best and most accurate results:

“The term “douchebag” generally refers to a male with a certain combination of obnoxious characteristics related to attitude, social ineptitude, public behavior, or outward presentation. He has an inflated sense of self-worth, compounded by a lack of social grace and self-awareness. He behaves inappropriately in public, yet is completely ignorant to how pathetic he appears to others. He often talks about how cool, successful, and popular he is, yet never catches on to the fact that he comes across as a total loser. Nevertheless, he firmly believes that he is the smartest, most desirable, and most charming person in the room… and will try to bad-rep anyone who would threaten to expose this facade.”

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