“Trump Won. Suck It Up”

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Whether you’re a Trump, Hillary, or “other” supporter, the outcome of the 2016 presidential election was a shock to all of us. Going into Election Day, Reuters gave Hillary a 90% chance of winning the election. Regardless of this and other favorable projections for Hillary, Donald Trump beat the odds and won the election. Now that Donald Trump will indeed be the 45th President of the United States of America, it is time for all non-Trump supporters to suck it up and move forward, right?

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Wrong. Liberals, minorities, immigrants, Muslims, women, and the LGBT community are in mourning. They need some time to process what has happened and what this election means for their future.

It is true that not much may change for some. However, this is not the case for many. The groups of people that have been singled out and attacked by Trump have fears that need to be processed before they can accept the outcome of this election. Half of America is grieving, and we need to allow them to go through the grieving process before motivating them to move forward.

As a mental health professional, I have supported many of my clients through grief and loss. Grief is associated with many forms of loss, including but not limited to, the death of a loved one or pet, the loss of a job or relationship, or the loss of hope as a result of the outcome of a presidential election.

Grief is a complex experience with many stages. The stages of grief include denial, anger, depression, bargaining, and acceptance. I’d assume that most grieving Americans are still in the denial, anger, and depression stages of grief.

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If you’ve ever experienced any form of loss, you may understand that reaching acceptance can be a long and uncomfortable journey, especially when the loss is unexpected. Research has consistently shown unexpected loss is more difficult to cope with than loss that is anticipated.

As stated earlier, Hillary was the favorite to win the election. As a result, many were blindsided by the outcome of the presidential election and are still struggling to wrap their heads around what has happened.

I’ve seen many political commentators on CNN, MSNBC, FOX, etc. and friends on social media (including Liberals and non-Trump supporters) minimize the feelings of the grieving American people by telling them to “accept the outcome” and “move on.”

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Yes, some losses can be more troublesome than others, but to minimize someone’s very real feelings for your belief of how they should feel is simply callous.

Although we all hope to eventually get to acceptance, hearing others invalidate your feelings by telling you, “you’ll be okay” or  “it’s not that big of a deal” does not expedite the process by any means.

We will be okay. But give us time to process what is going on before you tell us how to feel.

4 COMMENTS

  1. Tarik, thank you for the heartfelt article. I feel the same. It shocks and saddens me that a tyrant will attempt to lead this country. As the sister of a gay man, my fears are that along with him and other gay and lesbian citizens, minorities, women and anyone else Trump deems unfit as an American will suffer at the hands of his stupidity and bigoted views. I pray that we can weather this storm….it will be VERY hard.

  2. It’s not that I am as you say “Callous.” However, many of us endured the past 8yrs without protesting by rioting and destroying our own neighborhoods, killing and beating people because our candidate lost. Didn’t see anyone passing out cookies or giving me a day off to mourn the difficult past 8 yrs!. This is the most outrageous thing I have ever seen in the past 53 yrs of my life. Choosing the better of two evils was not an easy choice for most but clearing we wanted change and clearly the country voted. He hasn’t even entered the oval office yet and like when Obama was voted (Even though he was not my choice), I accepted the COUNTRIES decision, put my big girl panties on and stood behind our commander and chief. So, ok call me callous!

    • Yup you are callous. And nasty like pretty much all of Trump’s supporters. You are like a mean 13 year old girl taunting the class scapegoat, pull your big girl panties up or go kill yourself” Right? That would make you very happy I am sure. And btw, “killing and beating people, rioting and destroying neighborhoods”? Really? More lies bc yeah that hasn’t happened. One of you shot at and tried to kill but only injured a protestor though. Oh well. Guess you’ll have to suck it up and get over it because no we won’t be standing behind your commander in chief as he is a racist, misogynist, xenophobic hateful person . Shame on you for voting for him though I bet you’ll deny being any of those things. And it wasn’t the “COUNTRIES” decision as you say. Only the deplorable minority, about 25% voted for Trump. The rest of us, the 75% majority don’t support him.

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