Why I Hate Carolina and Their Fans

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Hate Duke

I was born to hate Carolina. I bleed dark blue. It seems my colleague Frank Gaskill thinks he’s some kind of expert on the best rivalry in sports history. Let this list stand to correct and educate him as to why Duke is the best.

1. Tyler Hansbrough’s face (except when it was bloodied by Gerald Henderson, teehee).

2. Their fans are never gracious, always obnoxious.

3. Coach K has always had a better sartorial (look it up) sense than Carolina coaches. What is with the jacket and tie combos, daggum’ Roy?!?!

4. They think they own the state of North Carolina. Think again. Duke Nation!

5. Trying to make fun of their archrival with a misspelling (“Dook”), thereby undermining any claims of academic equivalence and strongly suggesting the paper classes they all take do not include spellcheck.

6. The only thing they can say about Coach K is that he looks like a rat, when we all know if he is any animal at all, it is the GOAT!

7. Let’s be serious, royal blue is way more attractive than powder BABY blue.

 

Why I Hate Duke: A Psychologist’s Perspective

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